


All Of Me

by pints (MegCapet)



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-14
Updated: 2014-09-24
Packaged: 2018-02-17 09:50:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2305418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MegCapet/pseuds/pints
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Junmyeon is still not over Kris and Tao won't let him suffer alone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> From a challenge prompt on Tumblr: "Have you seen Yifan's performance of all of me? Can you write a reaction Drabble about it from Tao or Suho's perspective? Like them watching him sing it for the first time?"

“What are you watching?” Junmyeon asks innocently enough, flopping himself down on the hotel bed next to Tao. The younger man slams his laptop shut, almost catching his leader’s fingers in the process. “Are you watching  _porn_?” Junmyeon laughs, reaching to lift up the screen. 

Tao shakes his head, but keeps the computer closed with an insistent hand, “I wasn’t watching anything.”

“You have a pretty stupid grin on your face to be watching nothing,” the older man says, putting on a cute act and nuzzling into Tao’s neck, “Come on, what it is?”

Tao doesn’t look at Junmyeon as he hands him a single headphone and opens up his laptop, restarting the shaky fancam . It doesn’t take more than the first few chords of “All of Me” for his leader’s body to stiffen and Tao wonders if he should stop the video now.

“Kris?” Junmyeon whispers as though he doesn’t believe it.

Tao doesn’t respond because he doesn’ t have to. Instead, he just wraps his arm around Junmyeon and squeezes his shoulder, praying that none of the others decide to come by to see what’s going on. They watch the video in silence, except for the occasional shaking sigh from Junmyeon, which Tao pretends not to hear.

As the video comes to an end and the crowd starts to cheer, Tao tries to break the tension with a little laugh, “He’s good right? He sounds good.”

Junmyeon’s smile is small and sad, “He should. We used to sing that song together at noraebang. Don’t you remember? He’s had a lot of practice.”

“Of course I remember,” Tao replies, pulling his leader that much closer.

“He used to sing that song for  _me_.”

Tao presses his lips together, struggling to come up with the appropriate thing to say. “Joonma? Are you okay?”

“No,” Junmyeon says simply, restarting the video. They listen again in silence. 

“I’m sorry,” Tao whispers, leaning his forehead against Junmyeon’s shoulder, “I shouldn’t have shown you this.”

Junmyeon chokes back the tears that are forming in his eyes, “It’s fine. It’s been months – I shouldn’t have gotten upset. He looks great, sounds good. I’m the idiot who is still sitting here, crying over some stupid boy.”

“You’re not an idiot,” Tao responds, lifting his eyes to meet Junmyeon’s, “And he’s not a stupid boy. It’s _Kris_.” They sit in the stillness for a moment, Tao watching his leader’s face as the older man struggles to keep from crying. Eventually a single tear escapes, which Tao instinctively kisses away. “He told me to take care of you.” Tao moves his laptop to the already crowded side table and lies down next to Junmyeon.

Junmyeon’s eyes are big and wet with tears that won’t stop falling, but he lets Tao arrange him on the bed until the younger man is straddling his hips and kissing every inch of his tear-stained face.

“He told me that when the time came, when you needed me, that I should take care of you,” Tao explained, nuzzling his nose against Junmyeon’s, “I know you’ve been so lonely without him. So tell me, do you need me? Do you want me to take care of you?”

Junmyeon’s nod is so slight as to be almost imperceptible, but Tao has studied this face for years and knows. He crashes their lips together, pushing his leader into the pillows, and it’s so natural that Junmyeon almost wonders why they haven’t done this before. Junmyeon submits completely under the younger man’s aggressive kisses, loving and hating in equal measure how easy it is to pretend that the man on top of him is his Yifan. They kiss and kiss until Junmyeon’s cheeks are dry and Tao’s lips are bright red.

Junmyeon pulls them apart, breathless, “What about Sehun?”

“No,” Tao responds, “Don’t. Tonight, it’s just me and you here,” Tao stretches out and restarts the video, letting their absent member serenade them once again, “And Kris.”

Junmyeon hesitates for a moment, before closing his eyes and lifting his hips up against Tao.

Tao smiles and leans in to nibble on Junmyeon’s ear, just like he had seen Kris do a hundred times in the back of the van when no one was supposed to be looking. “I’ve always loved you, Junmyeon,” he whispers in Chinese, his voice throaty and lust-filled as Junmyeon’s growing erection presses against his leg. “I’ve always loved you and I’ll never leave you.”

“Cause all of me,” Kris sings to them from across the sea, “loves all of you.”


	2. All of You

They meet in secret places now – every hotel room from here to Beijing, bathroom stalls and changing rooms and finally, Tao bends his leader over that last sacred shrine to their missing brother. No one has had the heart to move Kris’s things (and Junmyeon wouldn’t let them), so when they finally fuck in Kris’s old bed, they both imagine that it still smells like him. “Call me by his name,” Tao growls in Junmyeon’s ear, pulling the older man back by the hair until his entire neck is exposed to Tao’s angry kisses and marking teeth.

“Yifan,” Junmyeon whines when Tao enters him without hesitation and pushes him into the mattress. “Kris,” he moans when he is finally allowed to come all over Tao’s hand ten minutes later.

Tao whispers filthy, disgusting things to his leader in Chinese – dirty things from the porn films he and Kris used to watch together, hateful things that he wishes he could tell Kris today. He calls Junmyeon ‘ _duizhang’_  and it feels right on his tongue.

And every time, after they’ve come away from the game of purposefully mistaken identities, Tao delicately cleans every inch of his leader with a damp cloth. Junmyeon cries his forbidden tears and Tao hates his best friend, his Kris, that much more.

“What are you going to tell Sehun when he finds out?” Junmyeon whispers one night, as Tao kisses his way along every line of the older man’s body. Tao hesitates for a moment, then returns his attentions to Junmyeon’s inner thighs. “Sehun won’t understand,” Junmyeon continues, “He … Sehun just won’t understand.”

“And that’s why he can never find out,” Tao replies simply enough and the next night, when Sehun comes home to the room he shares with Junmyeon, he has a smile on his face like nothing their leader has ever seen. Junmyeon doesn’t press him for information, but Sehun has never been good with secrets and soon he’s telling Junmyeon about how passionate Tao has been the last few days and how Tao told him he was in love for the first time and Junmyeon congratulates him, before retreating into the bathroom to throw up his dinner.

But the next day and the next night, he finds himself back in Tao’s arms, wishing it had been this easy with Kris. “Kiss me,” Junmyeon will beg and Tao will kiss him. “Touch me there,” he asks and Tao touches him there and everywhere. “Hurt me,” he says with absolutely certainty when certain memories become too much to bear and Tao will do that too and will erase every single tear afterwards with kisses and sweet words.

Sehun continues to walk around like the world is his and Junmyeon feels a ball of black guilt growing in his stomach. But they don’t stop and one night, too many weeks later, with Junmyeon drowning in Kris’s old pillows and Tao licking away the ropes of white come across Junmyeon’s chest, the younger man pauses and looks up at his leader and whispers, “Do you love me? Could you love me the way you loved  _him_?”

“I don’t know that I could ever love someone the way I loved Wu Yifan,” Junmyeon replies and pretends to be too tired to continue the conversation.  Tao’s eyes go distant, but he nods as though he understands and returns to the business of cleaning away the evidence of their meeting with his hot tongue without another word.

The entire group hears Tao fuck Sehun senseless that night and Junmyeon sits alone at the kitchen table waiting for them to finish and wondering where they would all be if Kris could have waited two more weeks, two more months, two more years. He pours himself a shot from Jongdae’s secret stash of cheap, bitter alcohol, then four more, thankful that they don’t have a public schedule the next day. From the other room, Tao calls Sehun “his” and it’s not guilt that Junmyeon feels. It’s jealousy.

He dials Kris’s number.

“Hello?” says the familiar voice on the other end.

“You’re a disgusting bastard, you know that?”

“Junmyeon?” Kris says, his voice raised in disbelief, “Junmyeon? Is that you, mama?”

Sehun moans Tao’s name from the other room.  Junmyeon hangs up and doesn’t call back.


	3. Interlude

_Yifan tugs gently at Junmyeon’s freshly dyed hair as they lay in bed together and sighs, “I hate that they did this to you. I already miss your dark hair.”_

_EXO’s leader just shrugs and tries to nuzzle even closer to his lover, “I don’t think it’s that bad, do you? I sort of like it. I feel… sexier.” Junmyeon starts to laugh, but Yifan’s face is completely serious, cutting him off._

_“It’s just not you,” Yifan continues, watching the blonde strands fall back into place, “Leave this stuff for Kai or Baekhyun. I hate that they did it to you.”_

_Junmyeon busies himself with playful kisses and licks across Yifan’s chest, “You’re thinking too much. It’s just hair dye. And Sehun likes it.”_

_“Maybe you should go sleep with Sehun, then,” Yifan says, with a hint of darkness and frustration to his voice._

_Junmyeon bites a little too hard on Yifan’s nipple and rolls away from his boyfriend to look out the open hotel window, greeted by the Shanghai skyline, “Why are you being like this? Please don’t tell me that you are actually this mad about hair dye.”_

_“I’m tired, mama,” Yifan replies, wrapping his arm around Junmyeon’s middle and pulling him back against him. “I’m sorry. I’m just so tired.”_

_“We’re all tired,” the younger man says, tilting his head into the pillows so Yifan can leave a trail of kisses down his neck, “But this is a good thing. The next couple months are going to be hard, but it’s a good thing. This is it for us. For EXO. This is our chance. And it’s good.”_

_Yifan presses Junmyeon onto his back and climbs on top, straddling him and rubbing their noses together, “This is good. We are good. This bed is good and our bed back home is good. Mama…I’m still not sure about the rest of it.”_

_Junmyeon smiles reassuringly and kisses the corner of Yifan’s mouth, trying to change the subject, “You’re being so serious tonight. Where is my Galaxy hyung?”_

_“Tired,” is the only answer Yifan manages, cupping Junmyeon’s face in his big hands and kissing him full and hard on the mouth, tasting him with an eager tongue until Junmyeon is making those sweet whining noises that Yifan loves._

_“Just wait,” Junmyeon says, pulling away and studying Yifan’s eyes for any sign of what is going on behind the fierce kisses and frustrated sighs, “Just wait and it will get better.”_

_Yifan pins Junmyeon down with a quick adjustment of his hips, grinding his growing erection against his boyfriend through their boxer shorts, “What if I can’t wait anymore?” Junmyeon’s brow furrows and Yifan leans down to kiss him again, but the words come out too fast, “What if I need you right now? I just want to take you away. I don’t want to share you anymore. I want all of you for myself and I can’t have that.”_

_“Take what you need tonight,” Junmyeon answers, running his hands up Yifan’s thighs, “And then wait for me. One day, it won’t be so hard. But you know, this is my dream. EXO is my dream.”_

_“I know,” Yifan says with a quiet resignation, silencing himself with kisses against Junmyeon’s lips, then his neck, his chest, the lines of his hips, before slowly sliding Junmyeon’s boxers off. Yifan spreads the younger man’s legs gently and presses kisses there too, licking and probing at Junmyeon’s entrance with his wet tongue, slipping in a single, long finger when he feels Junmyeon relax enough to accept him._

_Junmyeon whines under his attention, reaching towards the end table where they had laid out supplies earlier, just in case. But isn’t this always the case when they’re alone together and Junmyeon eagerly passes the lube to Yifan, who is always so careful to prepare his lover, as though Junmyeon might break if they aren’t careful. Two fingers, then three and Yifan’s tongue continues to flick over the stretched rim until Junmyeon is almost giggling in anticipation._

_When Yifan finally slides into him, Junmyeon throws his head back and moans loudly, so happy to be in a hotel room without the threat of the others hearing them. He wants to be loud for Yifan, who loves it, and he calls his lover’s name with every thrust. Yifan is strong and leaves him a wrecked mess of mews and begging moans, every inch of him filling Junmyeon completely._

_“Tell me you love me,” Yifan insists, grabbing a handful of the hated blonde hair and pulling Junmyeon’s face close to his, kissing his forehead, “Tell me you love me and I’ll wait forever for you.”_

_But Junmyeon is too far gone, Yifan finally having found that perfect spot inside of his boyfriend. Each thrust is spike of pleasure and even though he hears Yifan, he doesn’t have words, so he just kisses him – over and over and over again._

_“Because I am_ so in love with you _,” Yifan says and Junmyeon nods, coming completely untouched across his own chest, as Yifan bottoms out inside him._

“Open your eyes,” another voice calls to him through the hazy memories of their last night, “Look at me when you come, hyung. Look only at me when you come. Please.”

Junmyeon’s eyes flutter open and meet Tao’s. The younger man’s voice is strained – he’s close, but he always insists that Junmyeon finish first. Tao’s usually rhythmic thrusts become more desperate as he nears his own orgasm. The younger man reaches between them and takes Junmyeon’s cock in his hand, smiling when it pulls a breathless whine from his leader’s lips.

“Tao,” Junmyeon whimpers, “Please, let me … let me go back.”

Tao leans into Junmyeon, pressing their foreheads together, “Stay with me. Don’t go back to him. Say my name and stay with me. I want you here. I want you to be right here with me. I’m right here.”

“Tao,” Junmyeon repeats, the name feeling dirty on his tongue, even though they’ve been playing this horrible game for weeks, “Tao, please.”

Junmyeon bites his lip so hard and suddenly when he comes that his lip starts to bleed, but he isn’t ready to call for Tao. Not when Sehun is still sleeping in the next room and Yifan is still in his heart. Tao clings to Junmyeon when he finishes, pressing his lips against Junmyeon’s jaw, mumbling his leader’s name over and over again until the syllables don’t mean anything.

 


End file.
